Baghdad, Iraq - In a shocking turn of events, Saddam Hussein, former ruler and tyrant of Iraq turned himself in on Thursday to U.S. officials. Complying with U.S. protocol, President George W. Bush awarded Hussein the $25 million dollars, which was promised to go to the individual who's information led to the capture of Saddam Hussein.

"This day marks a huge victory for the American people," said President Bush. "No longer will we be threatened by a murdering animal and maniac like Saddam Hussein, and we all must thank Mr. Hussein for making this possible."

Similar to Sheik Nawaf al-Zaydan Muhhmad, the citizen who's information led to the capture of Uday and Qussay, Saddam and the remainder of his family will live in protective U.S. custody.

"There are thousands of Saddam loyalists who would be more than happy to get a hold of Hussein for betraying himself and turning himself in to get a cash reward," said a confused President.

The reward could not have come at a better time for Hussein as his bank accounts were frozen by U.S. officials and his palaces were ransacked and robbed by his people. Saddam already has big plans for his $25 million.

"I thank the U.S. for giving me such a large sum of money," said Hussein. "I can now rebuild what was torn down by the infidel occupiers. I pray to Allah to give your country a thousand blessings for your generosity and to help me strike down you American pigs who have tried to run me out of my country."

Immediately following the interview military officials removed Saddam from the press room for interrogation and immediate protection and relocation.

While the recent transaction has confused many, President Bush felt that the ends justified the means.

"Some might be a little worried about the possibility of living in the same neighborhood as Saddam Hussein," said the President. "But you must realize that this man sacrificed his life to get his life…I mean turn his life over to us…um. We have Saddam, OK? Stop complaining"

Building on Saddam's capture, Bush is determined to move ahead with his plan and has already begun contacting international terrorists and worldwide criminals, to inform them of the available cash reward.

"Similar to the 'Guns fun Cash' program which was introduced last year, our new program 'Insane Killer Madmen Lunatics for Cash' will be just as successful," said Bush.

"I know that it is a matter of time before we award millions of dollars to our nation's enemies, who are willing to take the risk to turn themselves. We hope these men will follow Saddam and become the noble man that he has grown to be."

Hussein, who was on the phone with Iran and Korean President Kim Jong-Il, failed to comment.